Most of us think of emotional support as something we offer through words — by listening carefully, saying the right things, or sharing a person's burden. But researcher Michael Poulin has found that giving help to others, not receiving it, is what buffers people against the harmful effects of stress. In study after study, he found that people who helped others were less likely to die than those who didn't, even after accounting for their overall health.
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Because time is something we can measure and tenderness is not, we keep trying to ward off the singular sense of personal failure that the loss of love can bring by measuring the success of a relationship by quantity of time rather than quality of being, only to find ourselves on barren rock.
Maria Popova
"If there is something like a political life to be, to remain for us, in this world of technology, then it begins with friendship. Therefore my task is to cultivate disciplined, self-denying, careful, tasteful friendships. Mutual friendships always. I and you, and I hope a third one, out of which perhaps community can grow. Because perhaps here we can find what the good is."
Ivan Illich
The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy, or too impatient. To dig for treasures shows not only impatience and greed, but lack of faith. Patience, patience, patience, is what the sea teaches.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh — Gift from the Sea