Hidden Brain

Why Conversations Go Wrong

We often think that the source of conflict in our relationships is a difference of opinions or values. But much of the time, the problem is something more fundamental: we think we're communicating clearly, when we're actually not communicating at all.

Hidden Brain

How to Be A Better Partner

When we feel that our partner is not meeting our needs, we tend to assume that we've chosen the wrong person. We blame them for being selfish, or insensitive, or not trying hard enough. But research suggests that the problem often lies not with our partner, but with how well we've communicated what we actually need.

Hidden Brain

How to Be A Better Partner

Most of us know that relationships require work. What we don't always appreciate is that the work is often counterintuitive — that what feels natural, like defending yourself when you feel attacked, or withdrawing when you feel overwhelmed, can be exactly the wrong thing to do.

Hidden Brain

How to Be A Better Partner

Most of us, when we feel hurt or disappointed by a partner, focus on what our partner did wrong. But Epstein says the more useful question is: what did I do to make it hard for my partner to respond well? It's a subtle shift, but it can transform the way we see our relationships.

Hidden Brain

How to Be A Better Partner

When we feel hurt by a partner, we often assume they meant to hurt us. But John Gottman's research finds that in the vast majority of conflicts, partners are not trying to wound each other — they're trying to meet their own needs. The problem is that the strategies we use to meet those needs can inadvertently hurt the other person.

TED

The Missing Ingredient in Every Peace Deal | Hiba Qasas | TED

Without these, a peace agreement becomes a lid on a boiling pot. It looks calm until the pressure finds the weakest point -- then it erupts.

Fresh Air

Palestinian & Israeli activists share a vision of peace

by revenging the death of our parents, we are not going to bring them back to life. That's it. They are dead. And by avenging their deaths, we're only going to escalate the cycle of bloodshed, of pain, of suffering that we, we Palestinians and Israelis, have been trapped within for a century.

Fresh Air

A veteran diplomat breaks down the Iran war

To have a successful negotiation, you really need three elements. You need two parties who are willing and able and are prepared to use diplomacy, not to browbeat or to issue demands for each side, but to actually create some sort of balance of interest. Number two, you need a shared sense of urgency. And finally, you need an end product, some agreement, some deal, text.

The New York Times

Turning Point USA Clubs Expand to High Schools Across America

If we don't talk, we'll never get to get outside of our echo chambers. And Charlie Kirk always said, when we stop talking, that's when violence happens.

TED Radio Hour

Curious stories of coexistence

Every day we hear about nations, different groups of people struggling to get along. Humanity seems unable to overcome its differences. But what can we learn from more unusual examples of strange bedfellows?